For the past year of doing this column we’ve really focused on bringing you guys some awesome cocktails. We’ve been able to shy away from beer because we’ve had a beer column of the week. This semester we don’t have one of those so we thought we would expand our horizons a bit.
That brings us to Olivia (Liv) Stenger, the photo editor for the Daily Campus. Liv hates, and I mean hates, beer. We (meaning me) thought it would be fun to have Liv try a wide variety of beers and see if we could change her mind.
I was not successful, however, but Liv was kind enough to write up her thoughts on each beer. I This guide is perfect for anyone who doesn’t like, or hasn’t tried, any beer and is interested in what’s out there. This is a selection that you can pick up from any package store and sits at a comfortable price range. We bought it for around $11 from Universal Package Store in Storrs.
I wish I had more intelligent and insightful comments to share, but I honestly don’t know anything about beer or how to differentiate between the various kinds. This is probably because I have tried my best to avoid beer ever since I tasted it for the first time several years ago. Also, anyone who is a beer connoisseur should completely disregard my comments. This experience solidified my aversion to beer, but it was still fun.
Bud Light: The reason I liked this one the most was because it tasted the least like beer. It tasted like it had been watered down. Also, I shouldn’t say that I liked this one the most, because I didn’t like it at all; it’s more so that I disliked this one the least.
Yuengling Lager: Because this was the darkest one out of all of them, I was expecting it to be the worst. I came to this conclusion because Bud Light was the lightest and also the weakest; therefore, I reasoned that the darker it is, the stronger it is. This was not an accurate assumption and I’ve been informed that the opposite is true. Anyway, I still didn’t like it at all.
Coors Light: This one had a lot of foam, which is apparently a staple of Coors Light. I didn’t know this, but I’ve been told it’s a widely-acknowledged fact. I found it to be too bubbly and almost carbonated.
Cisco Brewery Grey Lady: I ranked this one in second place after Bud Lite. It wasn’t that strong and the bottle had a mermaid on it.
Black Hog Brewing S.W.A.G.: I picked this one out at the alcohol store because I liked the can it came in. It had a picture of a pig with the word “swag” written across it in black capital letters, which I found whimsical and amusing. It wasn’t very distinctive and tasted the same as pretty much all of the other ones. But, it gets extra points for creativity in design.
Stony Creek Brewery Cranky IPA: This was repulsive. Anyone who says they enjoy drinking this is probably lying. It also has a really terrible aftertaste that lasts for way too long. The only good thing about this one is that it comes in a colorful and pretty, but insidiously misleading, printed can.
Thirsty Thursday is created by of-age students in the Daily Campus Life section. Recommendations can be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org. We will respond if we are sober.