Valentine’s Day is a struggle for those who can’t make up their minds while shopping. It is surprisingly stressful when several items bounce around in your mind and you can’t pick one gift that feels right. If you’ve felt similarly before, or are feeling it right now, then this article is for you. The gifts compiled for this list do not make typical Valentine’s Day shopping carts, yet because of that, they are all the more special. Let’s investigate three gifts that are guaranteed to make your partner faint this Valentine’s Day.
Hand-powered butter churner
For most of human history, butter was a rare and hard-to-produce commodity. Nowadays, most grocery stores have it in abundance — but with a hand-operated mechanical butter churn, you’re giving yourself and your partner the experience of a lifetime. Churners come in a variety of shapes and designs, but the easiest to operate are those that are essentially large jars with a hand crank located atop that operates a padel within the jar.
For those who have never churned, it is a strenuous process. It takes about 10 minutes to fully churn the whipping cream, all powered by the strength of your elbows. However, the struggle is all the more enjoyable this Valentine’s Day as you and your significant other can take turns churning the jar, or you can work cooperatively with one person holding the jar and another cranking — very romantic.
To top it all off, the possibilities are endless with butter churning. You could add spices, herbs, salts, chocolate powder, chili beans, bacon or just about anything to the churner and get some sort of butter combination as a result. A good gift provides an unforgettable experience, and I’m sure neither of you will forget the time you made bologna and cheese butter — a.k.a bolochutter.
High-quality butter churns are available for purchase online through The Vermont Country Store, Lehman’s and www.churncraft.com.
“Vroom in the night sky”
While a butter churner is a very practical, hands-on gift, “Vroom in the night sky” is a video game for the Nintendo Switch that costs a reasonable $9.99 on the Nintendo eShop.
First, if you are in the market for excellent games for Valentine’s Day, I encourage you to read Desirae Sin’s “Best video games to play with your Valentine” which is featured in this issue. However, while she covered the best games, “Vroom in the night sky” is actually one of the lowest-reviewed games on the Nintendo Switch, clocking in at an abysmal metacritic score of 17.
The mindset for Valentine’s Day shopping traditionally involves making the best possible purchase for your partner. Whether that gift is high quality, practical — such as the butter churn — or endearing, it needs to be the best of the best to warrant a purchase. I would like to present a case for why “Vroom in the night sky” possesses all three characteristics at the same time.
For starters, “Vroom in the night sky” is not bad. GamingTrend gave the game a score of 40, but admitted, “There’s no denying that I had some fun with it for the short-lived time I spent with the title.” Likewise, Nintendo Life left a similarly negative score of 30, yet admitted, “Technically the game works — there are no major bugs or glitches, levels and items unlock as you’d expect and pressing accelerate makes your bike go forwards — but that doesn’t make it enjoyable.”
The Nintendo Life review may have turned sour at the very end, but they still can’t deny that the game works. It plays as intended — though I suppose the developers didn’t intend for much to happen.
In “Vroom in the night sky” the player is a “magical girl,” a character type popular in Japanese fantasy games. They are then tasked with riding a flying scooter and collecting points and items to progress to the next level. There is no story in the game other than the quest to open a magical portal after completing all levels; all the while, the title only has two characters, one being an unnamed flying creature and the other an evil witch. It’s really not good.
Okay, those are the seemingly negative aspects of the game covered — but what makes a video game enjoyable, especially on Valentine’s Day?
A good Valentine’s Day itself entails spending time with someone, bonding with them, laughing with them and ultimately building lasting memories together. While playing a video game on Valentine’s Day is a great option for many to gain those experiences, the game shouldn’t be the centerpiece of that memory. Instead, give your partner a $10 eShop gift card, download “Vroom in the night sky” and bask in the mediocrity and humor that will only last for a half hour of gameplay. I assure you the game will bring out the same laughs, joy and happiness that a better-crafted co-op experience like “It Takes Two” would. Regardless, once you realize that it’s not the game that makes Valentine’s Day special, but the person or people you’re playing it with, then you’ll understand why this is a great gift purchase. Here’s to many memories zooming on a scooter in the night sky.
Bookstore mad dash
One of the best ways to form a lasting experience with someone you’re close to this Valentine’s Day is to get out and do something special together. Of course, many people are not fans of shopping, myself included, but what if there was a way to entertain the consumer desires of your Valentine’s Day partner while mitigating the strain of shopping, all while adding fun to the experience?
It’s inherent in the nature of a quiet bookstore that heading to one usually consumes an entire day. As shoppers determine the best-looking books they want to place on their shelves, they get trapped in an endless cycle of book scouring. They constantly loop around in circles as they peruse the same section they have twice before.
Truthfully, the bookstore may be the last place you’d like to bring your Valentine; but, there’s hope. A new trend popularized by many TikTok and Instagram accounts lays out the concept of a race through the bookstore. According to the general rules of the race, participants have a 5-minute timer to go through an entire bookstore. They then have to pick up as many books as they can before the time is up, otherwise, they won’t bring any home. There are many variations to this process, including capping the number of books the participant can pick out, as well as adding more time to purchase the products to account for waiting in line.
I propose that a great gift may come in the form of bringing your partner to a bookstore this Valentine’s Day, and as a gift, giving them your wallet. Inform your partner that they’re participating in a race, they can pick three books — and they’ll pay using your wallet, I admit that’s technically the gift here — and have five minutes to find/purchase them.
The best part is, if you’re into reading and shopping, why not have your partner do the same? Swap wallets, and run through the store together in a mad dash to find good books. Maybe as you see them running around a corner to go put back a book that they changed their mind on, you can stick your foot out to spice things up. It’s like playing Mario Kart in a bookstore, what’s not to love?
Conclusion
Whether you’re churning butter, playing “Vroom in the night sky” or dashing through a Barnes & Noble, I hope you feel the joy of Valentine’s Day in a way that makes the memories special for you — that’s the bottom line. If you prefer a box of chocolates and a rose as gifts, by all means, go for it. After all, it’s not the items alone that make the best gifts, but the love from the people who give them to you. Happy Valentine’s Day!