It’s common to be avoidant of criticism especially when it has to do with yourself. As part of a culture engrained in success, we’re conditioned to prioritize perfection; and there’s little room for error. What people need to remind themselves of is that avoiding criticism instead of engaging with it is stifling, hurting us more than helping and promoting a lack of growth. It is for this reason that I believe that constructive criticism is a liberating force which promotes not only dialogue, but ways to improve. As a culture, we shouldn’t fear opportunities to be better than who we were yesterday; positive changes in how we act and think in a growth mindset is a fundamental building block to achieving brighter futures, empowerment and liberation for everyone, including college students.
Why do some people refuse to change for the sake of being better? This is a lofty question that tends to vary from case to case, but one can assume that parts of the equation are apathy, fear, laziness and a general lack of drive to learn from mistakes and the world around us. Some people want to believe they’re always doing the right thing without looking at the facts and touching base with reason.
Another part of the issue beyond the individual is how we’re raised, educated and conditioned. We’re typically taught from a young age to obey and conform, whether that be within the family, the schooling system or both. To control children, many adults rigidly tell them how to act and how not to act. They could sometimes be harsh in their criticisms, leading to children becoming avoidant of conflict instead of seeing it as an opportunity to grow. It’s baked into our psyches to achieve and succeed, and if we don’t, we have little worth. If you’re not diligent and careful, these self-defeating thoughts could lead to a negative self-fulfilling prophecy: a fixed mindset.
There are many dangers to the fixed mindset. Limiting yourself to a certain unwavering standard that doesn’t move with you does not support your humanity nor your learning. In institutions we’re paying to attend, a fixed mindset is an objectively bad frame of thinking considering the way it strangles the capability to expand knowledge.
So, why does a growth mindset matter? Growth mindsets are the mindsets of personal liberation. Such a mindset empowers you to continue achieving, learning and most of all, to grow as the name suggests. We are bound to do wrong whether we like it or not. This is a natural fact, given that humanity is never perfect. But we don’t need to achieve the myth of “perfection.” We just need to keep doing better than before and continue changing in positive ways.
Where does criticism come into play with these fixed vs. growth states of mind? Criticism, in its rawest form, is a time to be honest, telling us certain opinions on what people dislike and would personally change. Genuinely listening to and seeking out constructive criticism is a sign of having a growth mindset, as those with fixed mindsets wouldn’t have a purpose to engage with such a practice.
Of course, there are more and less emotionally digestible ways to convey ideas to personally improve. On the positive end of the critical spectrum is well-intentioned constructive criticism, which has been used to help people improve their skills and expression in structured and straightforward ways not meant to attack people but to help them grow. Still, not everyone will want to be patient and understanding; the structure of the world doesn’t incentivize such a concept except for personal gain. That’s why on the opposite end of the spectrum and something we see increasingly more of on a daily basis is hateful rhetoric usually meant to degrade and put down others. This idea of dislike or outright hatred manifesting in expression may scare some people especially if it’s a deeply emotional response, but it’s incredibly important not to be filtered out by negativity if you want to grow and be better. It starts by reframing the berating as genuine criticism and looking at the arguments from a logical standpoint.
Remember that these are people’s subjective opinions with emotions attached to them which they are entitled to. Listening to these thoughts, even if you don’t necessarily agree with them, provides a wider perspective.
Listening to differing opinions to get to your own conclusions can be helpful to generate more ideas even if you don’t agree with them. Learning about the rest of the world is a beneficial practice that will do you well in terms of understanding people and even yourself. Learning is an activity appreciated by all lifeforms with brains, so make the most of it.
Criticism is an empowering force that tells us potential avenues you could take to improve. We shouldn’t take it too personally although it is easy to do so and is understandably scary for a lot of people. Criticism promotes learning as well as a growth mindset instead of a fixed one that makes us stay stagnant. In an ever-changing world, a little criticism can help us adapt and grow with the rest of the world instead of being stuck in the past. Isn’t it exciting to learn and to change into a new, different and improved person every day, especially as college students?