‘Lewis Capaldi: How I’m Feeling Now’ reveals the not-so-glamorous side of stardom


We all know the brilliant mind of Lewis Capaldi. His beloved top two hits “Someone You Loved” and “Before You Go” put his name in lights. His debut album, “Divinely Uninspired To A Hellish Extent” skyrocketed his career in 2019. He performed all year and grew extremely successful in a short amount of time. In 2020, the number of opportunities to bask in this glory was cut short due to the COVID-19 pandemic, forcing him into a hiatus people expected him to use to produce a second album. Some may see this break as an artistic blessing, but for Capaldi, this could have been one of the worst things to happen to him.  

People know Capaldi through two outlets: his music and his Instagram. Through his Instagram, people see a kooky side, whereas, through his music, people perceive him through an intense emotional lens. These two contrasting personas are what make Capaldi the unique and merry individual his fans all know and love.  

However, since his first album, Capaldi has faced overwhelming levels of anxiety and pressure. He explained that success made him even more insecure and fearful of his own shortcomings. The nerves of letting everyone around him down and not amounting to the brilliance he embodied in his first album put his work to a halt.  

Over the course of the pandemic, he and his family found his mental health quickly declining. You’ll notice on his Instagram videos, he makes a lot of ticking motions. In the documentary, Capaldi explains that these ticks were often accompanied by intense back pain and dizzy spells. Critics have credited these symptoms to drug use. Since the spread of this gossip, Capaldi has begun seeing both a therapist and a medical professional, who together have diagnosed him with anxiety and Tourette Syndrome.  

Due to these diagnoses, Capaldi’s family and team decided to put a pause on the production of his second album. Four months later, Capaldi had a breakthrough. He rediscovered his passion for producing music and found the strength to take the pressure and use it as motivation. While Capaldi — as any other artist would — felt nervous to release his new music, he did not dread it. From this, he gifted his audience with his single “Forget Me” in 2022. Additionally, he has since released two more singles titled “How I’m Feeling Now” and “Pointless.”  

I find it necessary to unveil the true meanings behind Capaldi’s two greatest hits. While they may sound like odes to old romances, their messages actually revolve around death. “Someone You Love” was written about his grandmother who died when Capaldi was young. “Before You Go” illustrates the words he wishes he could say to his aunt who took her own life when he was still younger.  

There’s also his single, “Forget Me.” Like his top two hits, this song suggests Capaldi’s possible wish for an ex-lover to never forget him. Really, he is singing to his fans and his hopes that they don’t lose faith or interest in him. In the line that goes “Two years and you’re still not gone,” Capaldi is referring to the two-year hiatus he spent without any signs of new music. He used his big “comeback” song as an opportunity to thank his fanbase, as well as a way to promise them that he won’t let his fans forget him.  

Oftentimes, audiences don’t see a non-scripted moment where a celebrity is openly vulnerable. Contrarily, Capaldi ensures that the main theme of his documentary is mental health and how to cope with it in the spotlight — being fully open about how he’s feeling right now.  

Rating: 5/5 

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