Let’s rewind to the ancient time of late September 2023. The University of Connecticut’s Women’s Center hosted a poetry reading by Chrysanthemum, an Asian transgender poetess. As a fellow Asian transgender poetess, I felt inclined to stop by and support her work after seeing a flyer in my residence hall. I wrote a diary entry about the event to preserve the experience.
There was a Q&A session at the end of the poetry reading. One of the most poignant pieces of advice was to handwrite a letter to someone you care about.
After sharing many letters with professors, teacher’s assistants, co-workers, friends and a girlfriend since the event, the letter became one of the most impactful modes of personal expression. One professor was brought to tears because she never expected someone to write a letter expressing deep gratitude to her. One letter led to a professor keeping in touch through email with monthly updates of what has been going on in our lives. Another professor gave away a free copy of a book because of the letter. A co-worker wrote a letter back and other recipients brought gifts.
Expressing gratitude in the moment when you can still personally feel it can make people’s days and even leave a permanent impact on them. It can strengthen your relationships and make them even more meaningful. Sometimes, people want or need to be reminded of why you love them, and the letter can be a great medium for that.
Some people may be thinking something along the lines of: “Letters are so old-fashioned!” Even if writing letters is old-fashioned, there is an inherent rawness and power to writing vulnerably, inspired by prior experiences with someone you care about and their effect on you. It’s because letters are so old-fashioned that people rarely expect them. They would nonetheless appreciate them. That is what makes writing a letter and sharing it with someone else so beautiful, especially for a young person.
And I wouldn’t have realized how fundamentally therapeutic and beautiful something like writing a heartfelt letter of gratitude was if it wasn’t for Chrysanthemum. If I never went to that poetry reading, my relationships with others wouldn’t have been as strong as they are today. Gratitude wouldn’t have taken such a huge role in who I am.
College is a time of self-discovery and personal growth. It’s impossible to sugarcoat the fact that it can be genuinely scary, but you can get acclimated to it. You can put yourself out there and prove that anxiety wrong. You can form relationships of various kinds and connect with others, including those with similar interests. You can find purpose and ways to better yourself. Many opportunities offered in the college experience can change your life in many different forms; you just have to find them and cherish them when you do.