Mars is still out-of-bounds but at the end of the week will move from Capricorn to Aquarius and square with Venus, which is moving into Scorpio; sun in Virgo.
Aries (March 21 – April 19): Tuesday – “Clint Eastwood” by Gorillaz; Wednesday – “Blue Monday” by New Order; Thursday – “Go to Town” by Doja Cat; Friday – “Win” by Jay Rock; Saturday – “The Night We Met” by Lord Huron; Sunday – “I Wanna Get Better” by Bleachers; Monday – “Devil Went Down to Georgia” by the Charlie Daniels Band
Taurus (April 20 – May 20): It seems like things should be going well. Four-day week, long weekend, cooler weather (sort of), but things are tense. Why are things so tense? If you go to the Health Education office on Wednesday between 4 and 7 p.m. there will be some doggos to help you figure it all out.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20): Go to the Involvement Fair on Wednesday and pick up fliers for 20 clubs. Sign up for the email lists on 10 of them. Show up to the meetings for five. Stick with two or three.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22): Play to your strengths this week and watch out for the people around you. Are they eating? Are they sleeping? Are they going to class and doing their homework? Are they healthy and happy? You’ll feel better knowing they feel better.
Leo (July 23 – August 22): I dare you to go a day without social media—no Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, whatever the kids are using these days.
Virgo (August 23 – September 22): This is the time to get out of that circle you draw around yourself and call your comfort zone. There’s a fine line between having a comfort zone and being one of those bubble people. Remember, the sun is on your side, sort of like Rapunzel in “Tangled.”
Libra (September 23 – October 22): What seems like a great idea at the beginning of the week may not look the same at the end; what seems like a good look at the beginning of the week may have faded by the end; the people you think you need at the beginning of the week may not be so vital by the end.
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21): The other night I was walking home after class and I passed this girl, who was kind of humming to herself as she walked, and I was like, “Hey, I do that.” Then I passed this guy, who was tossing his phone up and down and catching it, and I was like, “Hey, I do that, too.” Then I passed someone bopping along in their headphones, and it was all so relatable. Look out for that this week.
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21): Read something this week—a magazine, a textbook, all the terms and conditions, the instruction manuals you always feel obligated to keep but never look at, dare I say a novel. If you’re reading this, you’re already on the right track.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 19): If you don’t listen to “Hamilton,” you should start, because “Non-Stop” is your song of the week.
Aquarius (January 20 – February 18): This is how you pick a lock: Insert a tension wrench (L-shaped flat tool) into the lock and turn it in the direction you’d turn the key. It shouldn’t move too much until you use the pick (long pokey tool) to start poking around on the inside of the lock to lift the pins into place. Once you lift all the appropriate pins, the pressure you put on the tension wrench will turn the tools like a key, and the lock will unlock. Boom. Do with this knowledge what you will.
Pisces (February 19 – March 20): Take it easy, go for a run late at night and then take a shower that’s a little longer than necessary, put on something comfy and then sit in front of a fan (unless you’re one of those lucky air conditioning prats) and sip some tea or juice or water. . . you know, whatever you keep in your room.
Alex Houdeshell is a campus correspondent for The Daily Campus. She can be reached via email at firstname.lastname@example.org.