The sports world has come to a grinding halt in the wake of the coronavirus epidemic. It’s now been two weeks since the last NBA game and in that time, all other major sports have stopped. March Madness was canceled, the NHL stopped playing games with just about a month before the postseason and even the Olympics were pushed back to 2021 while everyone is focused on staying safe and healthy. In honor of today, which was supposed to be MLB’s Opening Day, the DC Sports staff tries to have some fun with social distancing and lists its picks for walk-up songs.
I was tempted to pick “The Sign by Ace of Base” but there is really just one option here, “Big Green Tractor” by Jason Aldean. It is a ridiculous song, but that’s the entire point. There is no greater troll than telling the pitcher he can take a ride on your big green tractor before taking his mediocre cheddar out to the fondue station in left field.
— John Whittle (@johnmwhittle) September 18, 2018
Seriously though, country music sucks so it will help me tune out the crowd and focus on sending a rocket (more realistically a bloop) over the shortstop. It’s hard enough to hit anything that registers 90+, so trying to do so while Post Malone or some random Metallica is stuck in my head would be impossible. My brain would hopefully automatically shut off any noise like this horrific song.
Easy. I’m walking up to the “Jaws” theme. No it won’t get the crowd pumped up. No it won’t get the adrenaline running through my veins. But the pitcher will be swimming in my ocean. When the crowd gets quiet, everything goes still and the pitcher gets a glimpse of the intense stare I’m giving him, best believe he will be scared. Once I win the head-game, the blood is in the water. Then this cold-blooded beast is ready to feast. Duuun dun. Duuun dun. Dun-dun dun-dun dun-dun dun-dun…
*jaws theme intensifies* pic.twitter.com/rE8kgGqBA5
— Tampa Bay Lightning (@TBLightning) January 18, 2020
This is a really tough one. My favorite walk-up songs are the ones that everyone in the stadium knows the words to. That way the whole crowd can cheer and sing together, getting the stadium so loud it might even rattle the pitcher. This might be cheating because it’s a copy of something a current player does, but I’ve never experienced any walk-up song more infectious than it: “I’ll Be There For You” by the Rembrandts, otherwise known as the theme song for “Friends”. Former Mets great Wilmer Flores famously used it as his walk-up song, and every time he came up to the plate it just got the whole stadium pumped up and energized, no matter the score. I mean, when you have a stadium full of tens of thousands of fans all doing the signature four claps at once, it’s magical! I’ll admit, I was trying to think of something more original, but my mind kept circling back to this. It’s really the only walk-up song I want.
the rembrandts- i’ll be there for you (friends theme) pic.twitter.com/WTsagt1sEl
— alerrie dancing to (@alerriedancing) March 19, 2020
Also, side note to all my co-workers who think that “Friends” is either not as good as “How I Met Your Mother” (blasphemous) or flat out not good (you’re dead to me), you have plenty of time now to watch it and appreciate how amazing it really is. I mean, what else are you going to do? Tune in to the online classes and do the assignments that are all now optional? Please.
nirvana – smells like teen spirit pic.twitter.com/ytgL96weng
— rt your fav songs (@rtyour_) March 22, 2020
I remember we did this roundtable last year, and my pick was “Smells Like Teen Spirit” by Nirvana because of its head-banging opening riff that would get everyone pumped up as I enter the batter’s box. Although that probably would still be my first choice, for the sake of not being repetitive I’m going to go with another song for the same reason: “The Boys are Back in Town” by Thin Lizzy. Much like “Smells Like Teen Spirit,” it has a shredding opening guitar riff that I feel is necessary for a great walk-up song. Second, it’s very recognizable because it’s one of the most popular classic rock songs of all time. So everyone would hear the riff and immediately know what song it was, another important attribute of a walk-up song. Finally, it’s just a fun song. It’s upbeat and it would certainly put me in the zone to get a big hit. “The Boys are Back in Town.” Final answer (unless we do this next year and I change it again).
I can't sleep, so I present to you Torey Krug's OT goal but it's set to "Holding out for a hero" by Bonnie Tyler pic.twitter.com/SxBY06Xzs5
— Greg McCarthy (@NotGreg4088) March 7, 2020
“Holding Out For a Hero” by Bonnie Tyler. Okay, okay, hear me out. First off, it immediately brings to mind the cinematic masterpiece that is “Shrek 2” and that epic battle scene with giant Gingy. But movie references aside, I mean, just listen to the first 30 seconds. The catchy piano or whatever that is, that little drum solo, those angelic background vocals. Bonnie hasn’t even opened her mouth yet, and I am already quite literally ready to run through a brick wall, or in this hypothetical case, smack a homer into the Yankee Stadium upper deck. Not to mention the song matter itself is perfect in a clutch situation, when my team is in fact in need of a hero. The song does go on for about three minutes too long — I’m actually concerned for Bonnie’s lungs by the three-minute mark — but it’s perfect material for a walk-up song.
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